Here is a little history about Fric and Frac...they met in the 9th grade, Frac's only year of high school spent in her home state. Frac was a little chubby and shy and nerdy and weird ("was"="is"), and Fric was always a golden god. He was always offensively handsome, charming, funny, welcoming and magnetic. Frac assumed he’d been that way since he was a fetus...but theres no way for her to know that. All Frac can say is that when they were freshman together, he was a dream boat. Not only was Fric all those things that girls would die for in boys, but he was genuinely nice (to Frac at least). They were friends, not bestfriends, but more than acquaintances. The two of them once skipped a couple periods together and walked all the way up to Fric's house so Frac could give him a back massage...and then he walked her halfway home. Frac's crush on Fric developed immediately, and lasted for several years - despite the fact that Frac moved away and never spoke to Fric again. Little Fric was in her heart since the turn of the century.
Fast forward 9 years, Frac lives on a far away coast and is the epitome of a miserable 23 year old girl. She had her heart broken a total of 3 times in her short life, and was stuck in a job that was growing more and more stale by the moment, thousands of miles from her family, quietly slipping into insanity. Until one day, the most basic genius thought popped into her head - why doesn't she move the fuck home! At least closer to home. At least ditch that job, and live alone for a while. Brilliant! So in the months of planning this huge life change, Frac realized she needed some asshole to drive with me across the belly of our fine country with. And the search began. Skip skip skip - Frac randomly adds Fric to her Facebook page when she saw a tagged photo of him on a mutual friend’s page. How EXCITING! Frac felt her heart pounding in her chest the moment she saw Fric's beautiful face. She’d known, though now she can’t remember how, that he’d been dating the same girl since Sophomore year in highschool - Franny. So Frac added Fric and never gave him a second thought. Not only did he lives thousands of miles away, but he had a Franny. And why talk to him? Whats the point.
Time passes, and eventually they are both on FB chat at the same time and begin a pretty healthy, silly, engaging, fun dialogue. Frac's car was snowed in and he offered to help shovel it out, despite the amount of land between them. Kind. Then Frac learn Fric and Franny BROKE UP! And he was on the market. Then god knows why, but Frac decided it would be a good idea for her to start flirting with him. And from here - it goes uphill for a while. They exchanged numbers, talked all day, every day - constantly. Frac invited Fric to go on the cross country trip with her. They made weekend visits to see eachother on the other’s opposite coasts. They fell in love quickly, made love perfectly, and were always screaming love from the rooftops. They made promises, shared secrets, and truly connected on the most basic and complex of levels. Frac was confident that this little Fric was her puzzle piece. He was all the things she wanted. And he complimented her in such a way that they decided it had to be arranged by a higher power. He picked up where she left off, he yinged her yang, he completed her life. This state of complete and total bliss lasted for a couple months. It was like floating. Every day was like heaven. Frac can remember so vividly a mental image of Fric & Frac laying together on a tiny twin sized bed, tanged up in eachother’s limbs - hovering above the world in their own little Utopia, with only a sense of euphoria. Anything was possible, with that love they created out of thin air - they could literally do anything. Frac had never laughed so much. She had never had the emotion of complete love before. Where she wouldn’t have hesitated for a second to offer up an organ, or lose a limb, or sacrifice her own little sister - for the sake of someone else (in reality, she'd always sacrifice her little sister, that thing is a monster).
Here she was, at the young age of 23 - with so much experience under her belt, it was a perfect time to meet her partner in crime. Frac had always been a firm believer in having one person to share everything with. As Christopher McCandless so desperately said “happiness is only real when it’s shared”. And though she spent most of her entire life looking for that person, at this time - she was absolutely not looking. Frac was planning on dating a tall, silly, Ginger psych student in Portland named James the Giant Peach. And she was genuinely just planning on banging Fric, making him drive across our nation - and sending him on his way. Ughk, if only that’d happened.
What DID happen is that they fell so deeply in love that they couldn’t go four hours without talking to eachother (they did a four hour challenge once...Frac lost). Every second spent away from eachother was an eternity, and every day spent together was a blink of an eye. They spent a solid two weeks together, and were in a state of bliss the entire time. It was magic. Fric was always promising Frac the world (but she'd never asked for it, or even wanted it). Fric knew that she always felt alone, and that everyone always left her, and he did his utmost to make Frac feel safe. He swore he'd be there forever, and though Frac was hesitant - she eventually let down her guard and began believing him. Frac wishes that she could have saved that emotion, saved those months...kept them in a box somewhere, so she could show her grandchildren. Sadly she had forgotten to take her emotion saving machine to the mechanic, and couldn’t. And the part of Fric & Frac that was perfect quickly faded. The fact of the matter is that their courtship was never in reality, it was in a magic land that they created. When they were together there was no jobs, no dogs, no car insurance payments, or rent, there was no getting milk at the grocery store or washing laundry. It was just the two of them, folding eachother into the other one’s heart. In many ways, it wasn’t real at all. It was real if all conditions were ideal, "with no traffic" (why do people say that, there's no such thing (in LA)). If they could have just done whatever they wanted with an endless source of money, then their love would’ve lasted a million years.
When shit hit the fan, Frac was spending a week at Fric’s house - visiting him. It was a lovely week, they had their first big explosive fight, but other than that - it was gorgeous. They laughed, ate, drank, made love, laid around...the perfect week spent together. The following week Fric was supposed to move up north to join Frac in a lovely city by a river, it was his idea. Fric wanted to make their relationship real, he wanted to live in the same city. He was always telling Frac that he couldn't wait to make her dinner every night, walk their dogs together, fall asleep holding her every night - he said he couldn't think of anything better. And when Frac tried to protect herself by saying he wasn't really going to move, and he was just trying to make her happy, Fric would scold her. And swear he was moving. He put the deposit down on an apartment and everything. He even pinky promised the night before she left. But then at the last second, Fric’s job didn’t transfer...he panicked and backed out.
And Fric dropped Frac. Just out of nowhere, Frac's entire reality crashed down to her feet. It was such a startling, painful, punch in the gut. She had never been so shocked and hurt and distressed and panicked in her whole life. She felt like everything ended. And as melodramatic and teenage as that sounds, its true. Frac's life ended that day in many ways. Parts of Frac that were honest and innocent and trusting were lost forever. All the best parts of her, the parts thats trusted people, down the drain.
How was Frac ever to trust anyone or anything ever again? After this man that she'd trusted with all her limbs, all her organs - could just bounce out on her with absolutely zero warning. How can someone just wake up and fall out of love with another person. Just one morning, you don’t love someone anymore. Is that how life works? Is that what you’re sending us into the world with?? Love is so deep...and so utterly shallow? Yikes.
So instead of dying, Frac got a german shepherd puppy and tried to survive.
As time unrolled, it was revieled that Fric dumped Frac because he was still in love with Franny. All loving Frac did...was remind him of how much he can’t live without Franny. Despite all the shit he’s talked on her to Frac, despite the fact that he’s cheated on her ten million times and has no respect for her (or so he says...Fric is quite the dramatic, manipulative, conniving little actor), he couldn’t be legit for Frac, because it made him feel guilty. He couldn’t be good to Frac, because that meant he was bailing on Franny. The only reason Frac doesn’t understand that is because she never had a relationship that lasted longer than a year. Even that one that made it to 11.5 months, was pretty much through 3 months into it. Frac has no idea what it’s like to feel that amount of loyalty to another human. Frac was raised in a family that would betray eachother in a heartbeat...for an Otter Pop, in the dead of winter. She’d love to know what that emotion of loyalty feels like, but she just doesn't. So she's always tried to be sympathetic. Frac can’t be hateful of things she doen’t understand. Thats gross.
The part that’s the worst is that EVERY SINGLE DAY (except one) since February of 2010, Frac has interacted with Fric. Even after he shattered her heart and ruined her realtiy...every day she speaks to her little Fric. It’s as if Frac can’t resist him. As if he’s put some sort of spell on her. It’s almost sick. Even when he is super shitty to her, and treats her like total dirt...Frac loves him. Even when he acts shady and does terrible shit in secret then claims innocence so vehemently. Every day. Frac choose to be there. What does that say about Frac? I’m not sure...but it’s nothing good.
As of today, Fric is in love with both Frac, his dream girl AND Franny, his long time girl. Frac is openly willing to do anything for him and his happiness. Franny has told him repeatedly that she just wants to be friends with him, and have him in her life - which is understandable since they grew up together. But she also keeps Fric on a very short leash, by saying that she sees them together eventually - but doesn’t know when. And as of recently, little Franny has decided that she wants to have Fric in her life EVERY SINGLE DAY.
What does that mean for Frac you ask? It means that she's on a sinking ship. Frac knows how people work, they work exactly the way that she does. She understands human nature and she knows exactly what is going on here. Fric and Franny think they belong to eachother. Both of them feel an insane amount of loyalty to the other. Mainly because it’s whats comfortable. Because it’s all they’ve ever known. And because the unknown is terrifying. Fric and Frac could have an amazing life together, because Frac is an amazing girlfriend. She is the girl that bakes you cookies when you get home late from a bachelor party and leaves them out with cold milk in an ice bath so you can just sit down and eat. She's the girl that will massage your head every single day. She's the girl that will blow you in the car, at Ikea, in Disneyland, at your parent’s house. She's the girl that is dying to go camping, ride quads, go rafting, so sky diving. She's the girl that will do anything to make you happy. She'’ll walk your dog, match your socks and make you sandwich. Thats just standard. She’ll bring you impromtu presents. She’ll send you flowers on your birthday. Thats just who this girl is. But little Fric can’t imagine actually having a life with someone who isn’t Franny. And in a lot of ways, Frac can abstractly understand that. Frac would never trade in her father - even though finding a father upgrade would be a piece of cake, because her father sucks...it’s just not an option. And that’s why Franny loves Fric too. Even though he’s cheated on her 90 times, and he lies to her, and has been shitty to her since day one - she can’t imagine not having him. Because he’s all she’s ever had. And Frac don’t doubt that their good times are very good, just like Fric & Frac's are. When Fric is good, he's great...but when he's bad, he's a shit storm.
What does that mean for Frac you ask? It means that she's on a sinking ship. Frac knows how people work, they work exactly the way that she does. She understands human nature and she knows exactly what is going on here. Fric and Franny think they belong to eachother. Both of them feel an insane amount of loyalty to the other. Mainly because it’s whats comfortable. Because it’s all they’ve ever known. And because the unknown is terrifying. Fric and Frac could have an amazing life together, because Frac is an amazing girlfriend. She is the girl that bakes you cookies when you get home late from a bachelor party and leaves them out with cold milk in an ice bath so you can just sit down and eat. She's the girl that will massage your head every single day. She's the girl that will blow you in the car, at Ikea, in Disneyland, at your parent’s house. She's the girl that is dying to go camping, ride quads, go rafting, so sky diving. She's the girl that will do anything to make you happy. She'’ll walk your dog, match your socks and make you sandwich. Thats just standard. She’ll bring you impromtu presents. She’ll send you flowers on your birthday. Thats just who this girl is. But little Fric can’t imagine actually having a life with someone who isn’t Franny. And in a lot of ways, Frac can abstractly understand that. Frac would never trade in her father - even though finding a father upgrade would be a piece of cake, because her father sucks...it’s just not an option. And that’s why Franny loves Fric too. Even though he’s cheated on her 90 times, and he lies to her, and has been shitty to her since day one - she can’t imagine not having him. Because he’s all she’s ever had. And Frac don’t doubt that their good times are very good, just like Fric & Frac's are. When Fric is good, he's great...but when he's bad, he's a shit storm.
And now you’re up to date. You ask what the fuck Frac doing here? She wishes she could tell you. All she can do is go with the flow and hope for the best. But be aware that this is going to end in blood bath. If you’re squeamish...go find something else to read.
